|
Today at church I heard a simple yet a powerful story that evoked in me the desire to share my testimony. I've written blogs about my journey coming to America; Another blog about my struggles as a high school newcomer student. However, I feel the need to share what God has done and continues doing in my life. If you've never heard of the story, "Donkey in the Well", here it is: One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway, it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement, he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well and was astonished at what he saw. With every shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off! I don't know about you but I've experienced a lot of dirt thrown at me left and right by the devil. Even before I was born, the enemy had a plan to destroy my life. I give God thanks for his timely intervention that saved me and changed my life. The donkey's story made me realize that through out my life I've been shaking off the dirt that was intended to bury me. I've over come not by my power but by HIS power and grace. Early YearsThe enemy is pretty much scared about our potential when we love and serve God. That is why I believe he tries very hard to mess with our life at an early age. He throws dirt at you so you drown and don't see the possibilities. My grandfather, Alfredo Bonilla, was a good man. I loved him...the memories I have with him are unforgettable. However, he did something that marked and forever changed my mother and my grandmother. He separated my mother from my grandmother. He walked away and disappeared with his 3-year-old splitting her apart from her mother's love and care. My grandmother spent years looking for and crying for her little girl. Her life began to fill up with anger and hate. Meanwhile, my mother started growing up in a very abusive environment. Not only was my mother forced to work from a very early age, but she also was a victim of verbal and physical abuse. My mother couldn't attend school because she had to work. She would go from door to door selling whatever my grandfather would give her to sell. She would spend hours and hours sitting at a market selling what she had been given to sell. My mother recalls looking at other kids playing around having fun and she would long to be the kid she needed to be. People would buy from her not because what she was selling was needed, but because they would feel bad for her sitting there all alone. I can only imagine what her life was like. No other family members to engage with. No mother to hug and care for her. Just an empty and sad life. At the age of 15, my mother met my father. She married him and hoped for a chance of a family and a good life. She had me at the age of 16. Sadly they separated a year and a half later. My mother didn't know that she was expecting another child when she left the relationship. When my dad was told about it, he didn't believe her and didn't recognize my sister as his child. And so my mother's life as a single mother began. At 18 years old, she was trying to raise two children on her own. Without guidance and support, my mother did what she could to raise me and my sister. However, she didn't always make good choices. She would leave me and my sister with neighbors while she would go to work. Sometimes she was gone for days and weeks. So I grew up defending me and protecting my sister. I knew that my mother was out and about trying to make money for us to have food, clothes and a place to live. At the age of 20, my mother had her 3rd child. Things were getting harder now with 3 children to maintain. My mother found a way out of her struggles using drugs. She felt like the drugs were helping her escape her reality. At 23 she had her 4th child but this time things were a little different. My sister's dad was willing to help my mother get a place and gather all her kids so we wouldn't be scattered anymore. It was the first time in 7 years that we able to be together and be under the same roof. The drugs, however, were still there. I learned to HATE drugs. I watched what it did to my mother and swore to never, ever, taste what was slowly destroying the one I love the most. I would beg her to stop. I would cry out to her to not do it again. She would see in my face the fear of ever losing her and she would promise me to stop. But it (the drug) was stronger than her will. Because of her circumstances, I would see myself responsible for caring for my sisters. I would cook, I would bathe them, I would care for them. I was 'mom' when mom was there, but not really there. One day, she was laying in bed past out...and my sisters kept asking for her. So I decided to make a chicken soup and bring it to her with the hopes that she would get up and be the mother we needed her to be. Because of her bad habit, my mother couldn't really sustain a job. She would get creative with things to do to make money for us to eat and pay rent. She would sell clothes, oranges, or whatever she would do to get by. At age 25 mother had her last child. This time she had a boy. We were super excited since there were already 4 girls. So there she was. A 25 years old young lady with 5 children on her own! If it was hard before things were about to get harder. A Way Out for MeA 9-year-old kid should not be looking around for a way out of her family. But I was. I was tired. Tired of the situation we were in. Tired of being 'mom' instead of a daughter. Tired of seeing my mother mentally despairing because of the drug. You see, the enemy was trying to get me. The enemy wanted my life destroyed just like my grandparents and my mother. There was no future for me. There was no way life was going to get any better for me and my family. Statistically, I should've been wrapt into drugs and early childbearing. This was the future I was destined to because the devil had all worked out from the very beginning. There was no other way out...so I thought! One a classmate must have seen how I was feeling and asked me what was going on. I started telling him how I felt and how I wanted out of my situation. He looked at me and said; "Why don't you go to Sunday school with me?" His invitations sounded like a way out to me! My Encounter with ChristA simple conversation with a classmate leads me to an encounter with my savior. I will never forget the peace and sensation I was feeling while seating there clapping my hands and singing to a love that was surrounding me and embracing my circumstances. I was presented to a God that cared about me and loved me for who I was. I encountered a love that gave me the strength to keep on living and keep on helping my mother and my siblings. From that day on, I never missed a Sunday at church. My friend's mom will come to my house to visit and wanting to pray for my mother but she would always hide in the closet. We would just pray out loud so she could hear God's love for her. I was baptized at the age of 12 and surrendered my life to Christ. I have no doubt in my mind that God intervened in my life just in time. I brought Jesus into our home. I brought peace and hope into our home full of chaos. But before things got better...they got worse! My mother didn't have work and her use of drugs was the worse it had ever been. I would get in trouble and sometimes beaten for throwing away her drugs when I found them in her pocket. I wanted nothing to do with something that was killing the very person who gave me life and was helping me survive. I remember making a chicken soup for her just so she would have the strength to get up and be the mother we needed her to be. I remember standing over her bowl of soup and praying for her. Praying and hoping that somehow this soup would snap her out of her situation. But she didn't need a soup to snap out of it. She needed Jesus. She walked out and left without saying where she was going. I feared for her life. I feared that one day she would walk out and never come back. So I would pray for her. I pray for God to protect her and bring her back home.
Hope and a New Opportunity For our Little FamilyThat day my mother came back home but she was not the same person that had walked out the door. She walked in yelling; "I found the Lord! I found the Lord!"; "I'm cleaned!" At first, I thought maybe she was drugged too much and not knowing what she was talking about. She wasn't making any sense to me. She sat us down and explained that in her desperation she had walked into a church and had a conversation with the pastor's daughter who happened to be there by accident. She was introduced to the Lord and she gave her life to Jesus. In that very moment, her life was cleaned and changed. She walked out of that church with a changed heart and clear mind. In a powerful and miraculous way, her body was cleaned instantly. With no trace of drug in her body. Our little family was getting a chance to a new life. Our little family was being restored from a destiny the devil had very well planned for destruction. You see, the enemy had a very good plan to ruin our lives. He threw dirt at us over and over trying to bury our potential and our lives. However, God also had a plan. A plan to restore. A plan with a full life, joy, hope, and happiness. John 14:6"I am the WAY and the TRUTH and the LIFE." God gave me this verse years ago. No, I didn't hear his auditory voice talking to me. But while we were in the safe house waiting to be transported to the U.S., I would daily see this verse in a picture frame and it was a reminder that God was with me. I knew he was making a way. Everything was going as planned, but we were coming to the U.S. undocumented. So I would ask the Lord; "You are truth and here we are, crossing the border illegally. How is that truth?!?" But the voice inside me would still say..."I am the TRUTH and I will make a way." And so he did. If you read my journey to America you will see how my God made a miraculous way for me and my family to be in the U.S. with our legal documents. All the time we were at the airport, there was a body of Christ praying for us. Praying for God to make a way and help us. HE came through. All glory be to the one and only who keeps his word. To the one who NEVER let go. Now, I have the life I never in my mind would imagine to ever have. I live a life in a country that for some time it was only a hope and a dream. I live life with Christ. The one and only who saw a little girl with no hope. A little girl how was about to give up. He saw beyond my circumstances and stepped in to rescue me. So all the dirt that the devil threw at me and was meant to bury me ended up being my stepping stone to get out and soar. Jesus didn't make the dirt go away; He was in the dirt with me making a way through!  The words that gave me hope every day. So, is there any dirt in your life? What are you doing with that dirt? Are you getting buried? Take the donkey's example and shake it OFF, step on it, and get out from that situation. God is a faithful God who rebuilt, repairs, and revives! Isaiah 61:4 God bless you and Thank you for reading!
0 Comments
Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
Leave a Reply. |
